May 31, 2012 at 9:47 AM ET
Our pre-caffeine roundup is a collection of the hottest, strangest, and most amusing stories of the morning. Here's everything that you need to know before taking that first sip of coffee today.
Why would super-secret spy software be written in a video game language? As security researchers continue to unpack the digital mystery that is the Flame virus, that's just one question looming over perhaps the world's most intriguing digital whodunit.
Speaking of mysteries, is this Amelia Earhart's anti-freckle cream (found on an uninhabited island)?
In other online security news, registered sex offenders who have been banned from social networking websites are fighting back in the nation's courts, successfully challenging many of the restrictions as infringements on free speech and their right to participate in common online discussions.
In other social network news, everybody is wondering why Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg doesn't take a break from his honeymoon and deal with his company's mess of an IPO.
(Speaking of Zuckerberg's honeymoon, he's also a lousy tipper!)
Also, Facebook is messing with grammar. The things you "like" are now your "favorite."
Congress to consider giving more control of Internet to the United Nations, but critics say the plan would make it easier for other countries to silence dissidents.
Oh! And a data breach toppled Australian LEGO fans! Nearly 1,600 told their personal info on website may have been compromised.
So, here's a knife-wielding robots that can debone chickens at superhuman speed ... that can't be good.
And a new device may allow doctors to tell how well you've been eating after doing nothing but shining a laser on your skin for 30 seconds ... kind of like a robot mom.
And BuzzFeed continues to up the ante on anthropomorphizing animals on the Internet, now with Instagram kitties with feelings.