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Countdown's Countdowns

From the Tuesday, March 16th show

Countdown’s Top Five

  1. The profit of Jesus.  Urban Outfitters on the trend with its very own, very controversial dress-up magnetic Jesus doll.
  • James Caviezel, the actor who plays Christ in the film, got to
  • Speaking of that magnetic Jesus doll, the earliest possible date Jesus could have worn briefs would have been
  • Vapors from the butter flavoring at a microwave popcorn factory leaving ex-worker Eric Peoples with permanent . 
  • The top two products that also use one of the chemicals that gives microwave popcorn its butter flavoring, diacetyl:
  • Horrors of the highways.  Police name as the suspect in the sniper shootings around Columbus, Ohio, after his father gives authorities one of his alleged weapons. 
  1. A motorist has died because, police allege, a man bought a clothes dryer, tried to drive it home.  It fell off the back of his truck, and rather than retrieve it or tell anybody about it, he simply
  2. Amanda Young was
  • Jackson and the grand jury, a request for Michael Jackson to testify voluntarily. Sources say he will decline.  His ex-wife, , could be next, after an interview on Australian television.
  • The footage of Osama bin Laden, by an unmanned CIA drone the year before 9/11, obtained exclusively by NBC News. 
  • The
  • Bush's fake

Five numbers that shape this day

  1. Six million -- dollars spent this week on political ads by the Bush campaign. 
  2. Two million -- dollars spent this week on ads by the Kerry campaign. 
  3. 8 million -- dollars spent over the last two weeks by Democratic groups supporting Senator Kerry. 
  4. Five million?  Also dollars, the amount for which Master Card sued Ralph Nader for ripping off their "priceless" idea in his 2000 campaign ad.  The judge threw the case out this week. 
  5. And $20 million.  Well, that would be the amount spent on the ad campaign featuring the sock puppet which led that company quickly into bankruptcy. 

Today’s Top Three Newsmakers

  1. of the Dominican Republic who is described as having become a, quote: "tourist attraction" after having checked himself into a local hospital.  He was suffering from -- um, male excitement for the last six days. 
  2. , the daughter of actor Charlie Sheen and his wife Denise.  Not to be confused with .
  3. on Sunday on a visit to the White House, was introduced to the secretary of the interior Gail Norton, and told the secretary of the interior, "You've done a nice job decorating the White House."

Let's Play 'Oddball'!

  1. Nothing revs up the crowd at those monster truck shows more than when the monster truck of all monster trucks destroys a junked car, like at the Calgary Saddle Dome in Alberta, Canada, earlier in the month.  One unnamed fan was especially delighted at first when the truck "Gravedigger" squashed a 1992 Buick Regal, until he realized 1992 Buick Regal. 
  2. A young Afghan, a soldier, unable to come up with a dowry for a human bride, went out on a date instead.
  3. And from the ever burgeoning file of evidence of imminent end of civilization as we know it, it's . 

Keeping Tabs

  1. On the other hand, the star of our friend William Hung continues to rise, from "American Idol" to COUNTDOWN, back to "American Idol," back to COUNTDOWN.  He`s now become an Internet pop-up ad, Hung's picture adorning a trivia quiz about which song he sang during his infamous "American Idol" audition.  Eat your heart out, Chubby Checker.