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Pre-caffeine tech: Google Facebook fight! Shirtless Alec Baldwin!

I know, right?!!
I know, right?!!via BuzzFeed

Our pre-caffeine roundup is a collection of the hottest, strangest, and most amusing stories of the morning. Here's everything that you need to know before taking that first sip of coffee today:

Google! Google! Google!

Mark Zuckerberg must feel like Jan Brady to Google's Marcia as the search giant continues to roll out new stuff along with its Google + social media advenuture. For example:

Not to be outdone however, Zuckerberg promises a big surprise from Facebook next week!

In other social network news, Twitter is the subject of FTC investigation.

Oh, and Twitter is now at 200,000 tweets a day -- many of which may be from bots.

Speaking of Twitter, that sex slave smack fight between Ashton Kutcher and the Village Voice is still going on.

This viral video purports to show a "mothership" and at least three separate smaller alien spacecraft filmed in the skies over London.

Twenty years ago today, Finnish Prime Minister, Harri Holkeri, made the world’s first GSM call.

Speaking of old-timey phones, this is cool: A rotary-dial style handset accessory for your smartphone that somebody totally needs to buy me.

As we head into the July 4th weekend, please enjoy the top 16 pictures of topless Alec Baldwin on the Interwebs

Helen A.S. Popkin goes blah blah blah about the Internet. Follow her on Twitter and/or the Facebook , won't you?