A Michigan school music teacher briefly changed the "Deck the Halls" lyric that goes "don we now our gay apparel" to "don we now our bright apparel" the Associated Press is reporting. Apparently the change was made because kids kept giggling at the proper lyric, and the school has backed down and gone back to the regular lyric.
Oh please. I speak as the mom of a four-year-old. If you're going to change everything kids giggle at, you might want to start renaming Lake Titicaca and baseball player Albert Pujols while you're at it.
Use it as a teaching moment or just tell the kids to pipe down and sing the song as written.
And if you're going to revamp Christmas carols, there are many lyrics other than those of "Deck the Halls" to start with.
Don't tell me "Miss Fanny Bright" in "Jingle Bells" isn't a giggle-riffic name. And have you ever met anyone who really wanted a bowl of "figgy pudding," much less demanded it be brought to them or they won't stop singing? ("We won't go until we get some...") Roasting chestnuts on an open fire doesn't sound appetizing to me, but "heating cocoa in the microwave" just doesn't have the same verve.
Of course, there are also plenty of misheard carol lyrics, both intentional and accidental. Forget "gay apparel," how about "dawning now our day of peril"? Or "with a corncob pipe and a butt and nose"? Or "O cannonball" for "O Tannebaum"?