'Saturday Night Live' thinks impeachment hearings are a soap opera

"I kiss and tell and I take notes," said Ambassador Bill Taylor, played by Jon Hamm, one of the many colorful characters in "'Days of Our Impeachment."
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By Dennis Romero

"Saturday Night Live" cast its satirical eye on the characters America has come to know over the first week of impeachment hearings by presenting them as the soap opera "Days of Our Impeachment."

Actor Jon Hamm made a cameo appearance as Ambassador Bill Taylor, who testified at the real hearings in Washington. Taylor, as a soap opera star, says, "I don’t just kiss and tell. I kiss and tell and I take notes."

U.S. Rep. Jim Jordan, played by Mikey Day, accuses Cecily Strong's ousted U.S. Ambassador to Ukraine Marie Yovanovitch of saying things to Congress to make the president look bad because she covets attention.

"I love the glamour and the spotlight," she says. "That’s why I spent my career in Ukraine and Somalia."

U.S. Rep. Adam Schiff, D-California, played by Alex Moffat, notifies Yovanovitch that Trump published a tweet about her that could be seen as intimidating.

Jordan, a Trump defender, says, "If the president wanted to intimidate you, he’d shoot you in the face in the middle of Fifth Avenue."

The GOP congressman is then asked, if that happened, would he favor impeachment?

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"I'd have to look at the facts," he says, "but no."

Southern California lawyer Michael Avenatti, who once flirted with the idea of running for president before being accused of stealing from former client Stormy Daniels and attempting to extort Nike (he has pleaded not guilty), made an appearance to announce a "bombshell" about Trump.

"The president had an affair," the counselor, played by Pete Davidson, said. "An affair with a porn star!"

"Yeah we know," Yovanovitch. "No one seems to care."

U.S. Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (Melissa Villaseñor), D-New York, also appears. "I didn’t expect to see you here," Taylor says.

"I didn’t expect you to be such a low-key daddy," she responds.

The show's satirical news segment "Weekend Update" took President Trump to task for tweeting about Yovanovitch while she was testifying publicly Thursday.

"Everywhere Marie Yovanovitch went turned bad," the president tweeted. "She started off in Somalia, how did that go?"

"Weekend Update" co-host Colin Jost said, "As long as we’re talking about track records, Trump started off in Atlantic City. How did that go?"

Colleague Michael Che joked that he wouldn't mind seeing the president punished regardless of whether or not the allegations of bribing Ukraine's leaders are true.

"If you found out for a fact that Donald Trump was actually innocent but they’re sending him to jail anyway, would you mind?" he said.

Jost surmised that Trump, who asked the Supreme Court to protect his tax returns from public exposure, must have damning data in his IRS files.

"You know they're bad," he said. "This is like if your girlfriend asked to see your texts and you just threw your phone in the ocean."

Recording artist and actor Harry Styles performed music and made his hosting debut Saturday.