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Cyberstalking your ex? You're not alone

YourTango's breakup with your ex list.
YourTango's breakup with your ex list.

Did you ever have an ex that seemed to hang on in your life, like a bout of the crud that you just can't shake? Did it seem like he/she kept popping up in your Facebook news feeds and photos, or through e-mails with mutual friends? Or that worse, he/she was in your thoughts like an out-of-control Twitter virus?

If so, you fit in with the 71 percent of 1,000 people recently polled by YourTango.com who said "they think about their ex too much." Amongst singles, it's 81 percent. More than half (57 percent) of those not-so-swinging singles then said "thinking about their ex prevents them from finding new love."

How. Utterly. Depressing.

If that wasn't a buzzkill, get this: married folk are also infected by the ex bug. "Almost two-thirds of married people (60 percent) agree that their ex is on their mind too often, and 36 percent say their attachment to their ex interferes with their marriage." Roh-roh, that does not make for a happy union, does it?

Maybe part of the problem is how easy it is to stay connected via our digital lifestyles. There is a fine line between healthy curiosity and cyberstalking, and having such easy access to a person's information can't help but tempt people over that fine line. More often than not, they launch themselves over that line.

In today's digital life, it's hard to hit the delete key on ex-loves.

YourTango's poll revealed 59 percent remained Facebook friends with an ex after the break-up, and 48 percent (including 42 percent of married respondents) said they look at their ex's Facebook (or other social networking profile) too often.

While YourTango exclaims that these post break-up stats are "shocking," is it really that hard to believe that 74 percent of those polled admit to looking up an ex on the Internet? Yeah, didn't think so. 

More of these "astounding" stats:

  • 86 percent admitted looking (c'mon, gazing!) at photos of their ex, while 14 percent of the married respondents admitted doing so often.
  • 50 percent have "called, texted, emailed or IMed an ex when they shouldn't have." (Note to self: drunk dialing/texting/e-mailing and IMing not good. Stop.)
  • Now here's a stat that shockingly does not a have a breakdown of married people willing to cop to it: one-third of people admitted having sex with their ex, and 20 percent have done so multiple times.

With stats like these, it's only logical that 57 percent think they need help getting weaned off their ex. YourTango has dubbed Valentine's Day eve, Feb. 13 (which happens to be my engaged brother's birthday!) "National Break Up With Your Ex Day" in an effort to help people permanently delete their exes from their (digital) lives. Not only do they provide a handy dandy checklist (see image above) but they also created www.BreakUpWithYourEx.com, a Facebook page that'll keep you busy rooting out why you're so attached to your ex and how to cut the cord.

More Facebook stories, including other ways to delete your ex: