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Pre-caffeine tech: Quake crackups, more tech smack downs!

Oh noes! East Coast quake brings destruction to the Fett!
Oh noes! East Coast quake brings destruction to the Fett!via BuzzFeed

Our pre-caffeine roundup is a collection of the hottest, strangest, and most amusing stories of the morning. Here's everything that you need to know before taking that first sip of coffee today: 

So apparently there was this earthquake yesterday --  a magnitude-5.8 earthquake in Virginia that rattled offices and nerves from Washington D.C. to New York City and as far south as Chapel Hill, North Carolina. Here's why that happened.

Almost immediately, people rushed to Twitter — for news and humor -- tweeting more (per second) than they did when news of Osama bin Laden's death broke.

As it seems nobody was badly hurt, the Internet used to opportunity to mock Nature —because nothing inspires the humor center of the brain like the false sense of security that follows a quick reminder that Earth can kick your insignificant arse at any time.

Meanwhile, the quake's disruption of cell phone service by prompted renewed calls for Congress and regulators to provide a dedicated wireless network for emergency workers.

And with Hurricane Irene on the way, you should know that in an emergency, there are lots of first-aid and other important apps available for your smartphone.

As with any big event — especially a natural disaster — that draws people to the Web, online crooks quickly spring into action with enticing footage, "never-before-seen" pictures and donation sites, all designed to lure users into handing over their personalinformation or, in some cases, their money. So keep that in mind.

In non-natural disaster related news, it seems Google+ inspired Facebook to seriously revamp its privacy policies.

Sprint will start selling the iPhone 5 in mid-October — or so says a report.

Samsung attempts to battle Apple with cheap smartphones — so good luck with that.

In closing, 20 stunning photos of the East Coast quake's devastating destruction.

Helen A.S. Popkin goes blah blah blah about the Internet. Tell her to get a real job on Twitter and/or FacebookAlso, Google+.