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Pre-caffeine tech: Fake meat, new Doctor Who

Herbert Baglione via io9.com
Herbert Baglione via io9.com

Our pre-caffeine roundup is a collection of the hottest, strangest, and most amusing stories of the morning.

"Intense flavor": The $330,000 hamburger that was built in a lab hits the spot!

Twitter just added rules to better combat rape threats and other abusive talk.

The president went and blocked a court-ordered Apple sales at the last minute.

Lots of other government agencies want that info NSA is getting from our communication devices ... but the NSA won't share! 

Oh! But soon, your phone may be able to help feds monitor nuclear weapons!

CNET says the FBI developed real-time surveillance software and and quite possibly maybe wants to force Internet providers to use it. 

Doctor Who? The next one is Peter Capaldi, that dude best known as foul-mouthed political spindoctor Malcolm Tucker.

In related news: Mars would be a hipster paradise if rovers were into Instagram.

In closing: How do you make an abandoned asylum even creepier? Add eerie shadows

Compiled by Helen A.S. Popkin, who invites you to join her on Twitter and/or Facebook.